My youngest son had his last day of high school today. And I'm feeling pretty emotional about it.
Time has flown by. My life as a mother and a parent was better than I could have imagined in many ways. In other ways, I have regrets and the classic enneagram three thoughts, did I do enough, was I enough, and how could I have done better.
Perhaps making this moment so difficult is that it is the end of a season; there have been many of those in the last couple of years, but this one is hitting me a little bit extra. I'm proud, and I'm mourning at the same time.
When I catch my breath, I can count my blessings. I'm so thankful for this Super Yoga Palace community. So many of you have been with me over the last 13 years as I built this brand, this space, and this experience with my boys in tow.
Seasons change, and the transition is often bittersweet; I am in it, sitting with all of it.
I'm very happy that we yoga together tomorrow. The class I have planned for each of you is what I also need too.
This past year I made the most significant investment of my life by hiring a mindset and business coach. The hiring was the easy part, the hard part was putting the tools to work, but omg, has it ever been worth it! I've faced relationships, uncertainty, ebbs and economic flows, perceived limits, reframed my thoughts, and instead of overwhelm and digress tapped into my power.
I cannot reiterate enough how freeing it is not to see or feel that people or circumstances (regardless of the heavy or the 2020) stand in your way and that you can solve anything.
Tapping into your power is just a catchphrase unless you learn how to access it by managing your mind.
This fall, I’ll be leading my 6th Yoga School but the first to be on a “pay what you can”platform. I’m so EXCITED I am able to offer this training in a way that’s accessible to all and specifically the person who wants to teach yoga as a side or full time hustle.
My favorite part of Yoga School is the wellpreneurship portion, and this year I’ll be incorporating a mindset module by using the thought model created by Brooke Castillo of The Life Coach School.
Managing your mind will be the most valuable part of this training and the foundation of everything that will come after. As of this entry, the Yoga School 2022 waitlist is open. https://thejesswell.com/landing/yoga-school
This past Wednesday, I had my first (legit) show with The Polyphonic Spree in quite some time. We were in Austin performing with some other killer bands for ACL Live. That show brought back many memories from my early touring days.
I joined The Polyphonic Spree at 25 years young, married, and broke with a baby to boot. My mother was the one who always encouraged me to take this opportunity and tour. She willingly watched my boys even for two or three weeks at a time and encouraged my endeavors on stage, on the mat, and as an entrepreneur.
She is the foundation of thejesswell.com, @superyogapalace, and @yogandoils. I write a bit about what's been birthed in me because of her here.
My mom never made me feel less than, not enough for choosing a road less traveled. She believed in me, and that belief caught me, filled me, and through me, her belief carries over to you. #lovethelifeyouchoose
I know that not all biological mothers have the capacity to mother. I also know that you don't have to be a birth mother to be a mother, and it's never too late to allow someone to show motherly love to you.
Just some thoughts on this upcoming Mother's Day weekend. Some thoughts and a new tune I'm loving.
What if I told you I didn't teach yoga.
For 13 years, I've said, "I teach yoga," the same way you may say you "go to church or worship;" this can mean many different things to different people, but we have a general idea of what people are doing.
When people think of yoga in the west, by and large, most people think about bendy, twisty shapes, perhaps a meditative moment, and calm. And while just like church or worship, there will always be a wide net of experience and expression, the base of what is taught is asana or beneficial shapes; movement connected to breathing.
When you do a deep dive into yoga, I can hardly call the shapes I teach, the ques I call, the TED Talk I give, and the indie music I curate for the energetic experience "yoga" any more than you could call the food you get from Taco Bell, Mexican.
And I don't want to.
I was drawn to yoga in my 20s because I was a gymnast as a child, and to me, yoga looked like a way to have an exercise experience as an adult that resembled gymnastics. Over time and training, the width and depth of movement connected to breath provided a mind-body experience that I couldn't deny and wanted to share and still do.
For those curious, yoga as we know it (poses like warrior, down-dog, etc.) do not come from Hinduism but Sweden in the 1900s. Its original name was harmonial gymnastics. Indian nationals renamed the poses to honor their heroes and reclaim national identity, especially after the British presence of colonialism in the twentieth century. So what you get when you walk into a yoga studio is probably harmonial gymnastics developed by Swedish women.
Interestingly, The YMCA, a Christian organization, had a lot to do with the development of modern yoga. I prefer to call yoga a dynamic posture practice or movement & breath practice because that is what it is.
For my friends of faith who struggle with yoga but are curious about its benefits, let me share this. The early Olympic games were dedicated to pagan gods like Zeus and Nike. For most of us, the origin of sport doesn't keep us from wearing Nike shoes, or competing in early Olympic sports like running, long jump, shot put, javelin, boxing, or equestrian events.
So I ask you...
Would yoga by any other name be just as sweet? Would giving yoga a different name make it available to you?
When I think about traditional yoga, it looks nothing like what I facilitate, but I'm absolutely within range when I think of modern yoga.
This fall I'll be offering a YOGA SCHOOL in the modern sense of the expression. Super Yoga Palace is a dynamic physical experience that strengthens the body and mind and cultivates culture and community. YOGA SCHOOL will teach you to facilitate just that - Movement, Breath, Culture & Community.
The YOGA SCHOOL waitlist is open, with applications dropping this May. If you like what happens at "the Palace' and want to learn more, tap HERE
As I type, I'm making myself a morning meal, avocado toast and a sunny egg, listening to this YouTube about sewing a capsule wardrobe (I don't sew very well but would like to). I'm searching for an excellent machine to add to my Amazon birthday wishlist. The enneagram 3 in me is in full multi-tasking form.
But you see, that's just it. As much as I have many things going on at once, my soul is leaning toward simplicity. And perhaps it's not that I don't want always to be learning, volunteering, or contributing, but I don't necessarily want to share, write about, or have it monetized as I have in the past.
Some things can be hidden, simple, quiet, and small.
Hidden, simple, quiet, and small is a quote I read from Father Thomas Hopko of blessed memory that has stuck with me. At face value, these words seem counter-modern culture, but it's good to remember to put everything in context, and perhaps those words aren't for you but me, my rebirth, my Spring enlightening.
On returning from San Francisco and our visit to Holy Virgin Cathedral Joy of All Who Sorrow, I had a bad case of the summer camp blues; I don't know that I was expecting that. I figured that stepping out of my day-to-day on a pilgrimage of prayer and contemplation would be beneficial, but I wasn't prepared for the grace-filled experience that it was. I'm not even sure how one could prepare for that. I'm still pondering, and I hope to write more about it in this diary as I feel prompted to share publically.
My biggest insight. Get honest with where you are. Ask for help when you need it. Pray always and ask others for prayer; the saints are available to you too. Baby steps. The small things and the big things, the sweet things, the best things, and they're often the quiet things.
How are you being reborn this Spring? What does growth or spiritual growth look like for you in this season? How can I pray for you?
These are just a few of my thoughts, thank you for reading, and I welcome the conversation in the comments.
Ps. This is a picture of St. John the Wonderworker whose relics I was blessed to venerate on this trip. If you'd like to learn more about this modern-day miracle-working saint send me a message and I will offer some books suggestions.